The fair is in town.

Few words can describe the experience and excitement of the Arizona State Fair, where Ashley and I spent all Friday night with our friends Ryan and Jeff. But knowing me, I'm going to try anyway. We didn't have any plans for the weekend, so Ash and I were pretty excited once we heard that the fair was in town. We didn't know what to expect, and since I've only been to the Utah State Fair once in my life, and all I can remember is eating cotton candy while standing around watching a country singer whose name I can't remember now, my expectations were not very high.

As we were driving on the freeway towards Phoenix, we could see the bright lights of the fair in the distance. Ashley immediately perked up, and I could see that the thought of fast rollercoasters and rides were on her mind. As we were waved into our parking spot, it became very obvious that we were in a "sketchy" part of town - which gave us even more insight to who might be attending this State Fair. I immediately started picturing all the "carni's" (politically incorrect, but true) we would be running into, and I must admit that the thought of a bearded woman made my stomach churn (I quickly learned that the state fair is quite different from a carnival. Good to know.) Still, the fair pulls in all kinds. Kids with their kids. White-trash cowboys. Grandma's with hair extensions and nose rings. Lesbians. The local gang. And us.

As we walked into the fair, the booths showcasing a display of animal cruelty were set up towards the front: "World's Largest Steed!" "World's Smallest Horse! As tiny as a baby!" "World's Largest Gator! Alive!" "Only $1!" After the freaky stuff comes the food. So. Much. Food. All kinds. And almost ALL of it is fried. Fried bread. Fried churros. Fried chicken. And the best....the fried Snickers bar (The fair obviously caters to a healthy crowd). We didn't have the guts to try it, but I'm sure we will next time. Once we got past all the people noshing on their baby-sized turkey legs, we walked into what I can only explain as Ashley's dream transformed into reality. Arizona does not skimp on rides for their State Fair. Ashley's eyes light up as she took in the red, purple and yellow strobe lights. She was in her element. I on the other hand, was immediately dizzy. We got our tickets and proceeded to hit all the rides. I can only explain them as the SCARIEST rides imaginable, and on the verge of being incredibly unsafe. Death traps, if you will. As I screamed as if I was plummeting to my death on almost every ride (which I am still convinced I was), Ashley only asked for more and more. Our last ride of the night which I'll refer to as, "the human washing machine" almost ended it for me. And I mean, my life. While I shut my eyes planning what my funeral might be like, and our friend Ryan screamed, "What is the point of this? What is the point of this?" over and over, Ashley channeled her inner Wicked Witch of the West as she cackled at my tears and screams the entire time (Poor Jeff had to sit this one out). After visiting all the freakishly-sized animals on the way out (we got in for free, as we would NEVER pay and support such a thing), we decided to call it a night. All and all, we really did have a great time. I think everyone should attend their local state fair....if only for the people watching and fried foods.

We were so pooped from all the excitement of the fair that we stayed home the rest of the weekend. We plan on going back next week.