Rachel's Birthday Shout Out.

Rachel, I remember when you, me and Ashley used to eat tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches while watching Full House everyday after school. 

I remember when you used to cheat off me in Mrs. White's English class in 9th grade and never got caught.

I remember spending the summer of '03 with you, eating "Salad Shakers" (I really wish Mickey D's would bring those back) and singing to the Dixie Chicks in your car. 

I remember sleeping in your huge bed more than I slept in my own. And I also remember trying to squeeze 3 in Ashley's twin size bed...we did, and then took a nap.

I remember you dragging me out of bed in high school at 5 am to go to the gym...and then getting a Juice Tree right after, destroying all our hard work.

I remember how attached you are to your "blankie".

I remember thinking how lucky I was when we became such close friends, and wondering how I ever lived without you. 

I remember how to you took a huge risk and followed your dreams, creating the most stupendous and precious baby clothing line I've ever seen.

I remember how you were the only one who would tell me how it was when I was making a mistake - only because I know you care.

I remember how you always really listen to me and give me heartfelt and great advice. I would do anything you told me to do because I trust you that much.

I remember and think often of how you are the greatest friend EVER. 

Happy Birthday sweet Rachel....we love you, adore you, idolize you, respect you, and miss you even more!

Also, to my fellow blog readers, check out Rachel's adorable and amazing baby clothing line, Rachelli Design. They are the cutest little pieces ever and all the kids should be wearing them. Get some now before she gets really famous and it becomes impossible to get anything....

I'm not getting older, I'm getting better...

To preface this post, these are pictures of me on my birthday a month ago. Jeff, one of my best friends in the whole world, baked the most amazing yellow cake with homemade chocolate frosting that I've ever tasted. He also insisted that he stick all 25 candles on it (which, by the way, I now have to buy two packs of candles...since they only come with 24 a pack). After I successfully blew them out, the entire room filled with smoke. The second picture is of me trying to duck and save my lungs. 

I clearly remember the day I started to feel like an adult. Ashley and I were on our way home from Scipio where Darren and Lacey had invited us to get together with the whole gang. We had a great time, and if you put us in the country/outdoors, we get really giddy and playful...almost like children. Throughout the weekend trip though, it became increasingly evident that it was incredibly unpractical, and just down-right unsafe for us to use our bodies as if we were teenagers again. The many horseback rides, trampoline/night games and running around looking for adventures had taken quite the toll on what was left of us. Ashley spent the next couple weeks visiting the chiropractor for a trampoline-related neck injury and I spent the next couple days icing some sore muscles and tending to a bruise that went from my left hip down to my ankle. Okay, so we aren't as resilient as we used to be. Fine. It happens to everyone and we should just learn to age gracefully. And I plan on it. Still, just for the fun of it, I have compiled a list of reasons of why lately, I feel so old.

1-  First one, already mentioned...too many candles. Too much smoke sets off fire alarms. Enough said.

2- I find myself using words like "comfortable" when describing my ideal clothing now, and "practical" when shopping for shoes. I'm 5'1" on a good day, and I choose to wear flats because it just doesn't make sense to me to wear heels that would give me blisters, or knowing me...make me trip and fall. This also brings me to reason #3....

3- I "just don't get" teenagers and their fashion choices today. You should see some of the things they wear. Not only do they look ridiculous, but also just look really, really uncomfortable. I also find myself lingering around the faculty saying things like, "I can't believe kids today..." and to my students, I will start off an annoying number of phrases with things like, "Well, when I was in high school...," or "When I was growing up...".

4- Songs like Bon Jovi's, "Its My Life," and the "Macarena" are considered oldies. (Another thing I picked up from the kids at school.)

5- I could care less about rims, TVs/DVDs in the back of your car, or how much you spent on those pants. I'd rather throw my "G's" towards something worthwhile, like a new home, or on my family and friends. It takes a lot more to impress me now.

6- I realize that my parents actually do, "know what's best". They are always right and always have been. Also, I find myself enjoying the company of people older than the age of 50. Actually, I might prefer it. They are so full of wisdom and have so many great stories to share. I always come away feeling satisfied.

7- Weekends are still for relaxation, but also for being productive. I really do not want to be up at all hours of the night, unless it is in the company of the people I care most about. "Going out" has become much less appealing because I've got stuff to do.

8- I'm going blind. I wear sunglasses for at least 2 minutes after I've walked inside a building.  I only take them off when I'm in complete protection of the sun hitting my eyes. My eyes have become so bad and sensitive that I've turned into one of those people that you want to say, "Hey, where's the sun?" to and smack them upside the head for looking so ridiculous. 

9- Fear of the sun, in general. I have spent more money on anti-aging creams, lotions and treatments than I ever spent actually tanning to get all this "irreversible damage" I've been told I have. And yes, I have looked up the price of Botox...on more than one occasion. 

10- Up to a certain point, when you tell people how old you are, they will respond with a, "Oh, you are still so young." Now, when I tell people how old I am they say, "Oh...cool." or "Well, at least you don't look it....".

The Last Lecture

If you haven't seen this, I highly suggest that you take the time to watch the whole thing. Very powerful. Very moving. Very true.

Random thoughts/Blogging world, I've missed you.

I lost my car today. Yes, yes...everyone forgets where they park their car every so often. Today though, for me, this was a very bad sign. As I began scouring the grocery store parking lot, I realized that I never actually remembered parking my car. In fact, I couldn't remember the last 30 minutes of my life. What I thought about, who I saw...was all a blur. Had I been walking around in a daze for the last half hour? This of course, got me thinking (I know, big surprise) so bear with me as I as use this post as a life update/personal journal entry. 

This last year has been one that I will look back on as one of my most influential. After overcoming a bout of depression and being thrown full force into a life unrecognized due to some unforeseen circumstances, I feel like I know more about myself now than ever. I have, for lack of a better word, "re-learned" who I am, what makes me tick, my likes and dislikes, my hobbies, what I willing to give in relationship, and more importantly, what I want out of one (besides someone to hold my hand and slow me down). I have learned that I like doing things for myself, but love the fact that I have so many great people in my life that want to help me do them. I have gained confidence in knowing that I can get through anything and can take care of myself if I need to - independence, wow - its empowering. As much as I appreciate where I am now, this has not come without some new added pressure. Pressure and expectations I have put on myself. The last couple of weeks, I have shared with those around me a sense of urgency and stress that I am placing on my future. I have thought so much about what I "should be doing" that I am forgetting one of the biggest lessons I have learned so far. That being, to live in the moment and take (and appreciate) each day as it comes. I keep waiting for myself to "get somewhere"...that I am forgetting what is important to me. I want so much out of life. So much that it is bogging down my mind and I'm forgetting to breathe. While I think goals are a great and necessary thing, I also think my lack of prioritizing these goals is causing some crazy stress in my life right now. Unnecessary, but true. 

I am lucky to be surrounded with so many people that provide so much insight into my life. My younger sister, Amy, who is infinitely wise beyond her years helped me gain some perspective into what I might be missing tonight. She pointed out that I may be putting all my focus into things of the moment, things, "of the world" and not concentrating on what may really make me happy in the long run. Most specifically, family - present, and future. My closest friends Darren and Lacey pointed out that maybe there was too much "I " in my life right now. To get me out of a mini-breakdown that I had this past weekend, they suggested that I do something for others because true happiness, as they quoted to me, "comes from serving others". I think a lot is to be said for those two little things...family and service/charity. So, for the next little while, I'm going to think about worrying a little less, and try to put my trust in that by living each day to the best of my ability, things will fall into place. Key word being...try.

I hope you all watched "The Last Lecture" post that came before this one. I guess the moral of this post (since the solution is blurry) can really be summarized by my favorite quote in that lecture..."If you lead your life the right way, the Karma will take care of itself, the dreams will come to you....". More or less this was an excuse to write down my thoughts...hoping to get some comments, words of advice, life insight and so forth.

"Slow down and everything you are chasing will come around and catch you." - John De Paola